Silent Times

The night Christ was brought into this world by Mary was a silent one. There are no recorded words of Mary while Jesus was hanging upon the cross. What is it, besides silence that ties these two events together? Could it be that while at the foot of the Cross, Mary was thinking about how the son she once delivered is now delivering her? ~Fr. Ramatowski

"It was a labor of pain...It was a labor of Love" ~Andrew Peterson

Craftiness!!

In between hanging with the fam, seeing friends, and shopping I did manage to find time to do what I love….CRAFT!

Thursday mid-day before company came over I was checking my email and noticed that Walgreens had their calendars 50% off, so I decide to make one! Originally I was just going to use pics of friends and family and add quotes about life for each month, but then I was really digging some of my picnicked photos. So, I elected to go the picnicked photos and Bible verse route….which meant I got to spend way too much time picnicking more photos!! (Soooo addicting) I have to admit that I really love how it turned out, and am quite excited for the new year because of it!

Inspired by the Rock n’ Rollin Craft Fair Saturday morning I set to work in the afternoon and managed to whip out a hairband and clip in about 1 ½ hours or so. The headband was simply newspaper wrapped around an old headband I no longer used, and then I added the newspaper bow!

Than the bow was a little more complex, but once I covered the clip I just added another bow like the one above!

Gotta love crafting! Such a great way to spend some time relaxing while still being productive!

Be a STAR!

This past weekend, I was blessed with the opportunity to go on a short, 24-hour, silent retreat at Conception Abbey with a handful of other Rockhurst students. First off, if you haven’t been on a silent retreat, get yourself on one at some point in your life. And secondly, it you haven’t been to Conception Abbey, get there at some point….simply beautiful grounds…Moving right along to the point of the post.

Saturday afternoon I found myself lying on the floor of the Basilica behind the altar, with a dear friend April, staring at the ceiling. Yes. Laying on the floor of a church staring at the ceiling….why would perfectly sane people be doing this? (well…our sanity is under question, but that is beside the point) This is why :

BEAUTY. Simple beauty is what kept my gaze transfixed upon the ceiling for more than an hour that afternoon. It was during this time, that a thought entered my mind: We are all called to be stars. And not just any stars, but her stars.

What does that even mean, to be a star of Mary? It means that you live in a manner so as to shine, not for yourself, but for Mary to enhance her beauty. It is your job to adorn Mary, to be a beautiful witness to her through your life. You shine, so that Mary, Queen of the Universe, can be seen more clearly and loved more dearly. That all who may come into contact with you will come to know Mary, who will in turn take them to her son, Jesus. Being a star cannot be a self-seeking lifestyle, but a selfless one; where you desire nothing for yourself and everything for the greater glory of God through Mary.

May you shine, today and always for the greater glory of God.

The Full Story

Sometimes, you only know part of a story and you love it. It satisfies you, you are pleased with it. But there is more that is left unknown to you. And one day, it is presented to you. And it makes you love it all the more.

That was a recent experience I had, in regards to the Serenity Prayer. I had heard, what I thought to be the whole thing until this past week at CLC (Christian Life Community), when I was introduced to the entire prayer and now I share it with you.

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

enjoying one moment at a time;

accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;

trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life

and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.

Amen.

--Reinhold Niebuhr

Everyone's Way

"I told you at the start,

my life was not complete

until I crowned it by my death.

Your 'way' is not complete

unless you crown it by your life.

Accept each moment as it comes to you,

with faith and trust

that all that happens has my mark on it.

A simple fiat, this is all it takes;

a breathing in your heart,

'I will it, Lord.'

So seek me not in far-off places.

I am close at hand,

Your workbench, office, kitchen,

these are altars

where you offer love.

And I am with you there.

Go now! Take up your cross

and with your life

complete your way."

~Everyone's Way of the Cross

Christ crowned His passion with His death. Now, we are called to imitate His way of the Cross, not in our deaths per say, but with our LIVES. We are each called in a unique way to crown our 'way' with our lives. We were not made for death but for life! Go, and crown your way with your life.

Appearance is Nothing

“Spending time alone with Me can be a difficult discipline, because it goes against the activity addiction of this age. You may appear to be doing nothing, but actually you are participating in battles going on within spiritual realms. You are waging war --- not with the weapons of the world, but with heavenly weapons, which have divine power to demolish strongholds. Living close to Me is a sure defense against evil.” ~excerpted from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young

Sit and be still.

RELAX in the presence of God, the source of all you need.

Spending time alone with Him equips you for the battles waiting.

In your time with God, He girds you with peace and gentleness

and places the sword of love into your hand.

Without this time with Him, how can you be prepared for what lurks outside?

The battle is real, but so is the power of love and perseverance.

Poem-ness

So, I am not one to sit around and read poetry for fun...I actually find it kind of torturous for the most part. Anyways, so this evening after saying Night Prayer ,from this handy book I scored at a bookfair (for fifty cents!), I flipped to the Appendix II and stumbled across a poem that caught my eye. So, now I share it with you :)

Lead, Kindly Light

Lead, kindly Light, amid the encircling gloom,
Lead thou me on;
The night is dark, and I am far from home,
Lead thou me on.
Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.

I was not ever thus, nor prayed that thou
Shouldst lead me on;
I loved to choose and see my path; but now
Lead thou me on.
I loved the garish day, and, spite fears,
Pride ruled my will: remember not past years.

So long thy power hath blest me, sure it still
Will lead me on
O;er the moor and fen, o;ver crag and torrent, till
The night is gone,
And with the morn those angel faces smile,
Which I have loved long since, and lost awhile.

~J. H. Newman

Do Not Fear

2 Chronicles 20: 15 --- “Thus the Lord says to you, ‘Do not fear or be dismayed because of this great multitude, for this battle is not yours but God’s.’”

This verse sounds awesome and encouraging as it is, but let us dive a little farther into the meaning of the verse by dissecting it and examining more closely a few words.

fear: noun ---a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined

dismay: verb--- to break down the courage of completely

multitude: noun---great number [of anything]

battle: noun--- a hostile encounter or engagement

2 Chronicles 20:15 revised and simplified: “Thus the Lord says to you, ‘Do not allow the great number of [people/obstacles/failed attempts, ect.] to arouse distressing emotions within you or steal away your courage, for this hostile encounter is not yours but God’s’”

On 2 Chronicles 20:15, Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary states: “He encouraged them to trust in God. Let the Christian soldier go out against his spiritual enemies, and the God of peace will make him more than a conqueror. Our trials will prove our gain. The advantage will be all our own, but the whole glory must be given to God.”

Do not fear anything, for what you perceive as your battle is truly God’s. Allow God to fight for you.

Live for God and He will fight for you.

αγαπη

Universal Vocation

While we all have our own unique vocation, we are all called as the Body of Christ to a universal vocation of holiness. Pope Benedict XVI wrote:

"We are all called to holiness: it is the very measure of Christian living...Let us not be afraid to aim high, for God's heights; let us not be afraid that God will ask too much of us, but let ourselves be guided by His Word in every daily action, even when we feel poor, inadequate sinners. It will be He who transforms us in accordance with His love."

Brave

I've recently stumbled across [thanks to JoyFM] this older song "Brave" by Nichole Nordeman. The first time I heard it I simply liked the beat and thought it was catchy, then the past couple of times I've heard it have been perfectly placed and exactly what I needed to hear at that moment, thank you God. So I just wanted to [re]introduce you to this lovely song :)

And here are the lyrics if you like to follow along while you listen to a new song....I know I like to do that :D

Well it isn't letting me copy and paste so here is a link to lyrics.

I hope this songs speaks to you as it has to me. Peace.

Agony in the Garden

WEEDING.

If you have a garden, it must be done. It isn’t much fun to do, people usually put it off way to long, and then they dread having to spend ALL day (or two or three) outside working to restore their once beautiful garden. I’ve had my fair share of weeding time this summer, so I speak from personal experience.

Weeding is necessary because it allows the plants who were chosen to be in the garden to grow and flourish. It eliminates the competition. Allowing the plants to have full access to the nutrients they need to live. If one does not weed a garden, the weeds choke, bind, and overgrow the plants that are supposed to be in the garden. The plants will then either stop growing or die all together, neither of which is what the gardener intended.

Similarly, as Catholics we need to remember to weed the garden of our souls. Confession is a powerful Sacrament, by which our gardens are beautified once again. Through confession, we eliminate the competition for our love. All sins and idols are removed; we are released from their grasp. God frees us so that we may now live, totally and completely for Him. Giving Him all of our love, and using of all the gifts He bestowed on us to further His kingdom. If we choose not to go to confession, we are allowing ourselves to be held captive and choked by the weeds that have entered our garden.

Weeding is not always easy, the ground can be dry and hard or it could be super soft from rain. When the ground is hard and dry, it is easy to simply pull the tops off of the weeds. You can no longer see anything sticking out of the ground, so the problem has been eliminated right? Well, not quite. Your garden may look good for a few days or weeks but come back a month later and it is all over grown again! Talk about frustrating!! However, if you put in the extra work and time to dig down a little bit and discover the root of the weed, you can pull the whole thing up! And with the whole weed pulled up, your garden will flourish greatly!

Similarly, it is difficult at times to get yourself to confession. Why go? I’ve told God that I am sorry, and I truly am, so why do I need to go to confession? Why, because through the Sacrament of confession God pours grace upon grace on your garden. He gives you to tools needed to get down to the root of the weeds, and the strength to pull them up. With God’s grace moistening your garden, and the proper tools in hand, it will be much easier to remove the next weeds that spring up in your garden.

The longer you wait, the harder your ground becomes. So don’t put off weeding your garden!

Allow God to rain His graces upon you to beautify your soul once again!!

A Little Something I learned at Bible Study

Hello again! So this post is interactive, meaning you are going to need to put forth a slight bit of effort. So go grab your Bible and then continue on!

Slowly read Acts 5:12-42, and then continue.

Woah. Sounds like the apostles were having a bit of a rough time, to say the least. They were simply going about their daily life; preaching and healing when they were throw in jail for following the commands of God. They did not despair. The apostles had hope and faith that God would rescue them; they did not worry or fear they simply trusted.

And God rescued them indeed! They were led out of the jail and commanded to go and tell all people about their new way of life. When it was noticed that the apostles were missing from their cell and instead found in the temple, the high priest questioned them, “We gave you strict orders to stop teaching in that name. Yet, you have filled Jerusalem with your teaching and want to bring this man’s blood upon us.” ~Acts 5:28. To which they replied, “We must obey God, not man.” ~Acts 5:29

Gamaliel then spoke to the people, bidding them to be careful about what they do to these men. Saying, “have nothing to do with these men, and let them go. For if this endeavor is of human origin, it will destroy itself. But if it comes from God, you will not be able to destroy them; you may even find yourselves fighting against God.” ~Acts 5:38-39

So, the apostles were flogged and dismissed. And upon their departure they were “rejoicing that they had been found worthy to suffer dishonor for the sake of the name.” ~Act 5:41

In this life we are called to imitate the apostles; and that is one tremendous task! We are called to share our faith with all of those around us, knowing that it will not always be peaches and cream, that we will face persecution and opposition. But instead of backing down or despairing we are called to live boldly, knowing that the truth will indeed set us free. And set free, you will always be when you learn to obey God rather than man.

In a reflection by the “A to Z Guide to Bible Application” it is written, ‘Faith in God does not make troubles disappear. Rather, it makes troubles appear less fearsome because it puts them in the right perspective. You cannot expect everyone to react favorably when you share something as dynamic as your faith in Christ. But remember that you must be more concerned about God’s reactions than people’s.’ <--Epic win!

The high priest did not want the apostles to be teaching or ‘bringing this man’s blood upon us.’ However that is EXACTLY what we are called to do. To teach, by example and words, the way of Christ and to bring His blood upon everyone, for in Christ’s blood alone are we purified.

Troubles will arise, opposition will be had; but fall on God and you will be upheld. For what is of God, no matter how brutally or consistently attacked, will stand forever. You will not be destroyed if God is your center.

And when you are attacked, REJOICE! For as the apostles, you have been found worthy to suffer dishonor for the sake of Christ!! You were chosen from all people, because God knows that you have what it takes to withstand the hurricane of suffering. He knows this because you, His chosen one, do not have only yourself but you also have Him. And not only do you have Him, you have faith and trust that He has you, cradled in the palm of His hand; where He is and will be watching over you forever.

Life cycle of a Christian disciple:


Go out and live!
Peace

Where to?

So, I was flipping through my Bible this evening and re-stumbled across a little note that I had written, and thought it appropriate to share with you all :)

I had underlined part of Jeremmiah 11:23, which reads

man is not a master of his way; man's course is not within his choice, nor is it for him to direct his step.

Next to that I wrote in at one point

Lord, 'Which way shall I go?' should be a prayer ever on my lips.

Woah. That's a challenge from God. A challenge we strive to rise to with every choice we make, every step we take. For every smallest thing we do is either the fulfillment of God's will, thus bringing us closer to Him, or the rejection of God's will. Every. Little. Thing.

Nothing is too small to matter to God. God knows everything and has a plan for all the beautiful everythingness. There is a reason you should drive this route to work, or cut the grass today. You may not always know God's reasoning, because well let's be honest He doesn't follow our reasoning so He is kinda hard to figure out, eh maybe that has something to do with the fact that He is all-knowing and we are not. Possibility. But I'd bet my money on that possibility.

"Ask and you shall receive." ~ Matthew 7:7

Continually ask God what your next step should be. Ask Him during each moment to guide you so that you follow His will. Ask and you shall receive.

Peace and Blessings :)

Candle Like Fatih

Originally this was a note on Facebook I wrote awhile back, but I ahve been observing candles again the past couple of days and this popped into my mind, so I thought I'd share it here :) Enjoy!

So tonight at CLC we each got to light a candle and place it in front of us, which was not a new occurrence as we have done this many times in the past. Breanna was leading us in a reflection, but I was having difficulty concentrating and ended up looking intently at my candle and all the various parts. And then the next thing I know God has put this thought into my head which I have been developing since then.

Our faith is like a candle wick. At the beginning the tip is burning brightly with an intense fire, but then the fire desires more it needs more to survive. So the fire spreads down the wick and this continues each time the fire desires more. So too does our faith. In the beginning we are content and full of joy with the faith that are parents have given us, then we begin to crave more and more. So we seek God more often, in various ways, and through other people until we are once again happy with where we are. Eventually, we will indeed desire more depth in our relationship with God so we once again delve into new facets that we previously had left undiscovered. If the candle is left burning for long enough the whole wick will be consumed and on fire, as it is our goal to always be on fire for and going deeper in our friendship with God.

Also¸ the fire that consumes the candle wick causes the hard wax that it is surrounded by to soften and become more pliable. So too do we cause all of the people who surround us and who we touch to be softened to God and His works and voice, by our testimonies and actions of faith. By sharing our faith and light with others, we are softening them up to God’s hands, so He can work with and through them to soften up themselves and others to Him. As long as the wick is still consumed by the fire the wax will remain pliable, but as soon as the flame is gone or the wax strays away from the flame, the wax will again become hardened. Just like the wax, as soon as we walk away from our faith or we feel that it has been taken from us, we harden our hearts to God and all the joys He brings to us.

The wick is not consumed by the fire in a sense that once the fire has used it is gone, it still remains there as a symbol of where the flame has been and how it has gotten to where it is now. We too do not discard our past faith once we have gotten to a new level, we simply build off of our previous faith so we too can see what has lead us to where we are today and what has shaped us to be who we are now. If our old faith is gotten rid of, our new faith will not have a solid base and would most likely crumble like a building without a foundation.

Friends

Friends. How does one define friendship or label someone as their friend? There is no formula one can compute or a standard to measure someone against. One just all of a sudden recognizes someone as a friend, and their bond as being friendship.

Each friendship is different, because each person is unique. What you share with one person cannot be duplicated. You cannot go into a friendship saying I want what I have with this friend to be exactly like what I have with this other friend. I learned that the hard way, I would try to fit myself and another into a mold of what I desired our friendship to be and it never would work out how I envisioned it. Rightly so, because I was looking at the relationship all wrong, I had the goal of what I wanted in mind and tried to fit the nearest friend into that mold. Rather than approaching my friendship without having a goal in mind, and simply allowing God to mold us and allow us to grow together according to His plan. Trying to fit someone into your plan is much more work and does not bear nearly as great of fruit as simply allowing God to place someone in your life according to His plan.

Friends are people in your life, for day, hours, or years that accept you as you are while still challenging you to be better, who are there during the joyous occasions as well as the times of fear and questioning. They are people who you can talk freely with, not worrying about if they will judge or hurt you. Speaking your mind is easier with them, although not always easy, and you know you will always find comfort in their embrace. Admitting your weaknesses, fears and failures to another is a sure sign of friendship. For you are trusting them with all that you are, knowing they will love you anyway. With friends words are not even needed, for simply being together brings peace to your soul and a smile to your face.

Friends are people who may hurt you from time to time, but by recognizing yourself and them as flawed human beings you are able to use these times of hurt to strengthen your love for each other through forgiveness. Friends see and bring out facets of you that you never before saw, helping you to grow into the complete person God created you to be.

Friends are gifts to be treasured. Enjoy their company, but be ready to say good-bye. Love them, and let them love you. Search out their truest selves, and be your truest self with them. Show them God, and they will show you God.

“Spend time with your friend: sweet time --- walking, playing, praying; not so sweet time--- disagreeing, hurting, searching. Friendship embraces the whole spectrum of life itself.” ~From Friendship Therapy

Emily...It's Love

So, I've been wanting to blog/reflect about the past school year as it has recently wrapped up but obviously that hasn't happened yet and now I'm rambling....Anyways, I came across this song by Francesca Battistelli called "Emily (It's Love)" the other day and just had to listen to it simply because of its name.

Well, lo and behold it does a fairly good job of summing up past few months for me...funny how songs can be so spot on about your life sometimes! (About this, check out another post about this by Sara :))

This song is one of hope, that although things may be not going so great right now, in time things will turn around because of God's love for you. Why you? Why does God love you? I've asked myself that plenty of times...see previous post. Well, as Franny says "It's humbling. All of this done for you. It's love..." God's love is so humbling, I believe that is because it is given so freely and we can only hope and pray that one day we will be able to love as unconditionally as God does. Seeing how God loves so perfectly reveals how imperfect even our best attempt at true love is. Ouch. Eh. I think I just scraped my knees falling to the ground. It's humbling, always has been and always will be.

And "If you feel you've had enough. He's never given up." Ever felt discouraged, that there is no way you could accomplish something or overcome an obstacle? Have you given up on God because of this? Doubted His power or strength? Even if you have given up on Him, He has and will NEVER give up on you. Why? IT'S LOVE....ever humbling love.

It's Love. Believe it. Accept it. Live it. Give it.

The End is Near

So, as you know Lent is drawing to a close with roughly a week left to prepare yourself to be filled with the Risen Lord. For some, Lent may be going as well as a season of fasting can go and for others it may seem as though they are still getting into the swing of things. If you are a part of the second half, I encourage you to not lose hope! Although the time of preparation left may be limited, there is still time!! It is never to late to get back up again, renew your Lenten resolutions and draw near to the Father. I came across this prayer/words of encouragement today and thought I'd pass them along!

Don't Quit
When things go wrong
as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging
seems all uphill,
When you're feeling low
and the stress is high,
And you want to smile
but you have to sign,
When worries are getting you down a bit...
By all means pray---and don't you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
God's hidden gift in the clouds of doubt.
You can never tell how close you are---
It may be near when it seems so far.
So trust in the Lord
when you're hardest hit...
It's when things go wrong
that you must not quit!

Don't give up! Persevere in strength and hope drawn from the Lord, for without Him we can do nothing. Stay strong for the end is near! Peace and Blessings to you.

Music Sampler

Over the past couple of weeks I've been introduced to a few new artists and have really enjoyed their music! So, here I am paying it forward to you all! Well the three new (to me) artists are Mumford and Sons, Audrey Assad, and Jon Foreman.

Here is a little sampling of their awesomeness :)

Mumford and Sons: "Roll Away Your Stone"
Verse 1: Roll away your stone, I'll roll away mine. Together we can see what we will find. Don't leave me alone at this time. For I am afraid of what I will discover inside.

Audrey Assad: "Carry Me"
Chorus: You say I am blessed because of this. So, I choose to believe: As I carry this cross, You carry me. Help me to believe it.

Jon Foreman: "Your Love is Strong"
Random Section: The Kingdom of the heavens is now advancing. Invade my heart. Invade this broken town. The Kingdom of the heavens is buried treasure. Will you sell yourself to but the one you've found?

I encourage you to check out all of these songs in their entirety as well as other songs by these artists :)

Enjoy!

Lenten Reflection

Lent is almost upon us, so I have been spending some extra time thinking about various aspects of it recently.

I’ll be the first to admit that in the past I haven’t been too fond of Lent. It always seemed to come at a bad time for me (but isn’t that when we need it the most?). Usually Lents starts a little over month after the New Year, I have already forgone my New Year’s Resolution and then to be asked to make another resolution! Why? So I can fail at one more thing? Keep one fewer promises to myself? Lent always seemed like much more of a chore, than a process undergone to unite my sufferings with Jesus’ and grow closer to Our Father.

As Lent began creeping up on me this year I was trying to think in advance what I wanted to give up, add, and change throughout this time of self-denial. I must have written out about three or four various plans of actions in the span of two weeks, and it seemed like they were ever changing, one completely different from the next. I was trying so hard to find the perfect combination of giving up and taking up. Wanting something that would be challenging, but not too much so, because I wanted to be able to keep it without putting in too much effort, but enough to make it seem like a sacrifice.

I had been trying so hard for so long to formulate the game plan that I thought was a winner. A plan that involved an amount of self-sacrifice and denial that I would be able to handle without having to put in too much effort, in order for me to be able to say that I fulfilled my Lenten promises and never slipped up. And then this morning it hit me. I didn’t have to find a plan that kept me inside my comfort zone and would be easy to accomplish daily. I could have things on my list that were real challenges, and I might not succeed fully everyday in keeping those promises to myself. But you know what?! That’s OKAY!! For even Christ Himself stumbled and fell under the weight of His cross!

Falling makes up a good portion of the journey. You get knocked down so you remember to look up, to God, the one who can get you through anything and is always there to lift you when you fall. If you never fell the walk would not be as satisfying, for there is much more satisfaction in overcoming obstacles and doing something challenging than in completing something simple on the first go around.

So why stick to the easy things this Lent? Why not add something to your Lenten list that seems like a bit of a stretch? The only person it would hurt if you don’t is yourself. God thinks winning you over is worth all the effort….do you think serving, loving, and following God is worth all the effort? Will you give God all that He has already given you?

Prayers and Blessing for you as we enter this Lenten season. May Mama Mary care for you along this journey as she so desired to do for her son along His journey to Calvary.

Suggeted Reading

Hello there!

I am simply writing today to pass along a blog that I enjoy reading. It is written by Heather Paulsen, and I stumbled upon it during this past summer. I encourage you to check it out, she's had some rockin' posts. I especially enjoyed her last post....really makes you look at yourself in a new way.

Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

Growth and Brokenness

“I know that I deserve to die
For the murder in my heart
So be gentle with me Jesus
As you tear me apart”
~JJ Heller

You grow, get better, become stronger and then right when you feel like you have got things down and can relax, you break or more accurately get broken. God breaks you. He sees that you can accomplish so much more, be better, grow closer to Him, so He breaks you.

Right now, I am definitely going through a period of God breaking me. I had been trying so hard for a long time to be open and inviting people to really get to know me, and recently I began to feel like I was making progress, things were going well. I decided I didn’t need to try as hard anymore, and then God broke me. Or I guess it was more like God gave me an opportunity to be more open and share a lot more than I had become comfortable with, an opportunity to grow, and when I rejected that opportunity, multiple times, God broke me.

God breaks you, not out of spite but out of necessity. For if God had not broken you, you would have stopped trying to do more, to improve yourself, and grow closer to Him, merely our of comfort. If it were not for all the times that God has broken you in the past, you would not be who you are today.

Getting broken hurts, even when you know it is for the best. It is easy to give into the thoughts of doubt that you will never make it, you can never achieve what it is you are striving for, that you aren’t good enough. Instead, what you are challenged to do is to pick yourself up and keep walking. Don’t sit to entertain these thoughts of self-doubt, for they aren’t true. It is written that “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). Start walking, let Christ be the arm to steady you, the friend to pick you up when you have gone astray. Even if you do not know your destination, or where you are headed, start walking. The longer you wait to pick up where your journey left off, the more difficult it will be to begin again.

May the peace of Christ reign in your heart wherever you may be in this circle of life.

The Big V-Word

Vulnerability. That one word has been regularly infiltrating my thoughts and prayers for over a year now. I just finished reading Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge, and throughout the book they talk about the role vulnerability plays in femininity. Since I’ve spent a good portion of the last days reading Captivating, the topic of vulnerability has been plaguing my thoughts more than usual and thus spurred the blog post.

To me being vulnerable means to simply let someone see you as you truly are. No facades to hide behind, no half-truths, no switching the subject when asked a difficult question. Admitting your failings, struggles, worries and weaknesses. Being completely honest and open with others as well as yourself. Vulnerability is an invitation to let someone love you for you, and not for any other reason.

Woah, sounds demanding. I certainly find it to be. One must make a conscious effort to be vulnerable with others, because it isn’t a natural tendency. Society tells us to be strong and independent, when in reality we were created for interdependence—to live we must depend on one another. God does not ask us to live this life alone, but to live it surrounded by others who care for and love us and are willing to come to our assistance for any reason, large or small.

I think that one of the most frightening aspects of vulnerability is not knowing what the person’s reaction will be. Will they judge me? Are they going to tell others? Is this going to make things awkward between us? Will they be happy for me? I sure hope they don’t use this to hurt me….the unknowns go on and on, the realm of possibilities is endless. Because of all the uncertainties surrounding vulnerability, being vulnerable requires trust and a leap of faith.

So, what exactly is the point of vulnerability? Why should I expose my deepest self to others? Why put myself at risk for experiencing debilitating pain? In doing so, being vulnerable and taking the risks associated, you are allowing someone to catch a glimpse of your truest self, a glimpse of God Himself. Also, you are inviting another into a deeper understanding of who you are, and giving them the opportunity to simply love you as you are.

Are you willing to take the risk? Will you give someone a glimpse of God today? How about an opportunity to love? Why not?

Why Me?

Often times I find myself asking this question when I am feeling inadequate in life. Not that I am not good enough, but rather that God is too good towards me. I find myself wondering why God has chosen me to be gifted with so much.

I have been blessed with friends who love and care for me, keep me accountable as well as challenge me, and accept and trust me no questions asked. Another great blessing of mine is my family who loves me exactly as I am and, I am discovering, comprise a large portion of the core of my very self. I am also fortunate for my good health, all the opportunities that are open to me, as well as to be receiving and have received a wonderful education.

What did I do to deserve all this? NOTHING. Which is the main reason I find it difficult to accept gifts from God. Our society tells us that we have to work for and earn everything needed for our survival, so when someone freely gives us something we are taken aback, unsure of what to do.

So, if I didn’t do anything to deserve this, as none of us do, I am led back to the question of “Why me?” Why did God choose me? Was it merely by chance that I have received so many blessings? For, surely someone else could be putting all these gifts to better use for furthering God’s kingdom than I. Maybe I have been granted these gifts so they can be taken away, because that is what I truly deserve…to remain alone, unhappy, and broken. The speculations could go on for hours. The maybes will never end.

The good news is these questions, doubts, and worries are all FALSE! There is a reason I was chosen. God has a plan and a purpose for me and all he had blessed me with. We are all lowly, broken sinners. God blesses us anyways. ACCEPT His gift. For “He is the Lord, He will do what He judges best.” ~ 1 Samuel 3:18

Questions and Quotations

This weekend I went on a retreat put on by my parish for young adults, and had an absolutely blessed time. It is still challenging to put everything into words, I am not sure yet that there actually are words that are adequate to describe the going-ons of the weekend. Since I am having troubles stringing together words eloquently, I’ve decided to share some excerpts from my personal written reflections, Max Lucado’s “A Love Worth Giving”, which I was reading throughout the retreat, as well as questions of mine that arose throughout the weekend. Enjoy!

“Listen much, speak little.” ~Max Lucado

“In letting go, although I may feel powerless, I am actually empowering myself to be able to more easily find and follow God’s will for me and my life.”

“Surrender don't come natural to me. I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want, than to take what You give that I need.” ~Rich Mullins

When you call me, when you go to pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you WILL find me. When you seek me with ALL your heart, you will find me with you, says the Lord, and I will change your lot. ~ Jeremiah 29:12-14a

“Looking back at this experience I realize that it is in admitting that you have failed that you are given the strength to get back up again. It is quite humbling to admit that you are failing, but by lowering yourself at someone’s feet you are trusting them and allowing for them to care for, love, and comfort you. Just as Christ wishes to do every day, if we would just simply come before Him, humble ourselves and let Him love us.”

“Agape love cares for others because God has cared for us. Agape love goes beyond sentiment and good wishes. Agape love responds. Agape love forgives the mistake when the offense is high. Agape offers patience when stress in abundant and extends kindness when kindness is rare.” ~Max Lucado



Why do I stop, block, or impede others from loving me?

“[Observing] nature is like seeing God unmasked. It is God in His rawest, most pure form. Simply marvelous.”

“Is the reason we're not still to hear You speak because we don't believe You will?” ~Card Michael

“Silence requires openness and honesty. Openness because you have no idea what God may say or reveal to you. So you must be open to any and all possibilities. For He can do any and all things. It requires honesty, because to be truly silent you must be comfortable with yourself and your surroundings. It requires that you truly look inside of yourself and say “yes” that is me and I love it, accept it, embrace it. Silence also requires honesty because while you are open to all things you need to be honest with yourself about what God is saying and doing to you. It is only when you are honest about what God wills of you, that you will be able to say yes to God, and accept the challenge which is following His will for you in your life. Silence requires openness and honesty, and openness and honesty bear fruit in the silence of our souls.”

“You couldn’t see your purpose in life until he showed you.” ~Max Lucado

Why is it difficult to say “yes” to God, even when you desire to do His will?
“Hope doesn’t promise an instant solution but rather the possibility of an eventual one.” ~ Max Lucado



A bruised reed he shall not break, and a smoldering wick he shall not quench. ~Isaiah 42:3


“The father didn’t quit. The love for his children was greater than the pain of the journey.” ~Max Lucado

“In stillness and simplicity God speaks.”